The Best Made Plans...?

I am more than a little confused today...and to be entirely honest pissed. I was going to say peeved but that doesn't quite express my anger.

A friend recently sent me a stroppy message via the medium of a particular networking site venting her opinion that I have been remiss in my friend duties. She said she was fed up with being the one to always come and see me (she lives no more than two minutes away) and of being the first to text.

My initial response to reading her message was to be shocked and angry. Reading between the lines I have to say that I felt like I was back in school and one of my friends was complaining that I wasn't playing with them anymore. It felt like a temper tantrum demanding that I pay more attention to her. Being slightly hot headed my first instinct was to reply back wanting to know who she thought she was talking to speaking to me like that, and to tell her in no uncertain terms being friends did not give her carte blanche to make demands on my time and to speak to me like I was a piece of dirt and nor was it my job to entertain her...But I didn't.

I politely told her to slow down and take a deep breath. I said I was sorry she felt that way and apologised for not getting in touch with her sooner. I also said (which she is aware) that I've had a fair amount going on at the moment keeping me preoccupied. Admittedly my tone was on the cold side but I did tell her to meet me at 7am the next morning and we'd go for a run together (she happily agreed), and then invited her to pop round there and then for a catch up (to which I got no response). Feeling like we'd resolved our little dispute I thought nothing more of it, she certainly seemed fine and had apologised for having a go at me. So to all intent and purposes our spat was over, I'd reined in my temper and not roared my displeasure and all was good. I knew this because we'd made plans to do our usual morning run.

This morning I got up at 6am, got dressed into my fizz kit for our run and started drinking water to hydrate myself. She never turned up. No message, no apology. Nothing.

The thing is she has done this to me a number of times and each time I've let it go without a word. I know and understand that she has difficult 'things' going on in her life making her unhappy, just as I know as her husband works nights she spends a great deal of time alone (it's the nature of the beast when married to someone serving in the forces). So, I didn't tell her how ticked off I was every time she stood me up without so much as an explanation or an apology. I'd have a little rant and fume (especially when I'd got up at 6am and she hadn't shown) but I'd get it out of my system and forgive and (well not forget clearly) but certainly not hold a grudge. That's what being a friend is all about in my books.

The thing is I'm not so inclined to take that road this time. I am more than just a little peeved ... I'm pissed. It's not okay for her to do this and while I'm willing to hear her out I'm not setting myself up for this again - this time I'm going to tell her it's not on and I'm far from impressed.

At least that is the plan...