Wednesday Wonderings

There's only been one thing I've been wondering about lately: men. They, but L my husband in particular, are a complete mystery to me.

I've thought about reading Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus in order to help me better understand what goes through L's head in the vain hope that it might make me feel better. I suppose if reading it failed I could always then throw it at the back of L's head... that would certainly make me feel better.

Flippancy aside, even now when I try to imagine, understand even his thought processes or how he views his comments I draw a blank. Nadda. Zip. Zero. Nothing at all. As a person who always thinks before she opens her mouth and is painfully aware of the need to choose the right tone of voice in addition to the right words L's ineptitude, be it through ignorance or a blatant disregard for others, is jaw dropping. I dare say in someone else's husband it would even be entertaining, not so much in mine.

Here are some of the endearing and wonderful things he's said to me lately...

"You've been a little bit psychotic lately" - wtf?

"What's happened to your face?" well I'm just charmed.

"What's wrong with your face?" Nice.

"You're wearing that expression that makes women hate you" Well that narrows it down, cheers for that.

When I remarked that he said then nicest things to me first thing in the morning, that's usually when he decides is the perfect moment to enlighten me with these niceties, I was told "Stop being so oversensitive". How about I punch you in the side of your head? was my immediate first thought. I didn't. I felt like it, but I didn't. You can congratulate me now.

Holding up a diagram of what stress does to the body, "Look, it's like looking at you" Surprisingly enough he couldn't see what was negative about that?!

There have been so many gems lately I can't actually remember any more of them.

I understand men and women are fundamentally different - thank God! - but L's inability to think before he opens his mouth and the fact he is often so disconnected from emotion, especially other people's, is staggering. I'm beginning to think he wasn't just busy playing with the Lego at back of the room the day Mother Nature was giving out empathy, more a case of he was entirely absent - mentally, physically and emotionally. He was probably in his own universe.

Since I know I can't ever hope to solve the problem of the differences between men and women and I know when something has me beat...I'm going to turn my attention to wondering just how I am going to stop myself from throwing something at the back of L's head or punching him in the side of it....wish me luck.

The Cold, The Boxes and Me

I'm 11 boxes packed, dinner cooked and the house cleaned for L's return in about 15 minutes.

11 boxes with about 50 to go...*sigh*. How does one small 5ft woman accumulate so much stuff. Admittedly, most of my 'stuff' consists of books and academic studies not clothes or other female related paraphernalia. (Let's not mention my boots and shoes collection or jewellery). Yeah, let's not do that.

The boxes I have packed I've stashed in our spare room or in a cupboard but can I just say...IT TOOK HOURS TO WRAP AND PACK AND TAPE! HOURS!

I can safely say I ran out of excitement today.

I've had achy eyes, a dripping right nostril, a sore right ear, an achy head and hot flushes...ugh! Please don't let that be a cold coming on...I really don't have time for a cold!

Brave New World

It's my last weekend in this house, my last in Berkshire. I've a weekend of packing and indecision ahead of me, in fact some of that indecision has started already, how much and what do I pack? In theory, I love that mythical impractical thing, I should just be able to hand over the keys to the removal company and they should do everything. But I'm impatient and I have control issues and so this leaves me with what do I pack and where do I start??

Even as I descend into a dog chasing their tail with indecision I find myself turning toward our new house, the new area we're moving to, the new job I'm going to get...it is all very exciting. This isn't something you would usually find me saying, Usually I'd be listing the things I'm worried about, the things I fear may go wrong and generally being quite apprehensive about it. This time I'm not, this time I'm smiling, I'm eager, I'm ready and I can't wait to experience this new world - bravely!

"And that," put in the Director sententiously, "that is the secret of happiness and virtue-liking what you've got to do. All conditioning aims at that: making people like their inescapable social destiny."
- Aldous Huxley, Brave New World, Ch. 1

Couldn't have put it better Mr Huxley, couldn't have put it better.