Women Understand Women and They Hate Each Other

That statement has been ringing in my ears for some time now. The rest of goes, so what chance do men stand and right now I'd place myself with the men.

I'm an NQT (Newly Qualified Teacher) at a special school for children who have experienced sexual trauma, obviously it's tough. On any given day the children are always verbally aggressive and abusive, often violent and rarely remain in their seats for a whole lesson. Despite being sick of being someone else's punch and kick bag, I'm not too put out by it - they are children with deep rooted issues and no access to emotional literacy to express their trauma.

What I'm really struggling with is the toxic environment created by my colleagues. There's a power struggle going on between the current head and a teacher who wants her job (and is making it personal.) It's exhausting and a horrible place to be.

I made the decision to distance myself from it, after all I'm there to teach and nothing else, but in doing so I'm now very isolated. I'm floating in no man's land like a ephemeral ghost, searching for souls to guide me but having no light to gravitate to.

Recent changes aren't going to impact me too greatly, I've already been doing the lion's share of the work, teaching, planning and marking that another teacher has managed to shirk. What angers me is sitting on this knowledge, quietly, silently, being the woman that does that, but then being told that I'm most definitely flapping about it. No, no I'm not because nothing really changes for me.

I want out. These people are not my friends and they are not nice people. So now I sit and pray with fingers crossed for Friday to come, bringing with it the list of teaching vacancies.